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Last week was a really busy week for me. I saw clients, taught an extra yoga class, led a workshop, and closed my week with a 2.5 hour yoga intensive. Have you ever noticed after an especially frantic and chaotic week, that your body and mind create this sort of inertia, and want you to keep moving at the same pace? Continuing on scares us, but slowing down TERRIFIES us, especially for those of us whose self-worth is tied to how much we do each minute of each day of the week. Slowing down allows space for thoughts, fears, and things we don’t want to face head on; we’d rather just let them dance around in the background of our consciousness, where they’re less intense. Yes, believe it or not, being busy (not necessarily productive) is easier.
So coming in to a lighter week this week, my mind was already spinning with ways to fill my time; ways to be seen and heard; ways to feel needed and relevant. And as I sat down to write a sequence for my yoga classes, nothing came to me. Where I am normally filled with themes and inspiration, completely empty. At first I panicked; then I became irritated; then a bit of logic kicked in and I thought, “well, I guess it wouldn’t be the worst thing if I re-used one of my previously written sequences”. And that’s true, it wouldn’t. But what’s really cool is the revelation that came after.
I allowed myself to walk away from the project for the moment. I turned my focus to other things, and decided to let go of the fear-based thought spiral, “what if inspiration quits coming to me for my themes? What if I quit having things to write about? What if I no longer have meaningful things to offer?” Instead, I accepted things as they were, just for the moment. Without realizing it, I surrendered my own ego, and opened up space for the greater good to work through me. And while the yoga sequence didn’t come to me, this gift and lesson did: the Universe has a plan far greater and more intricate than our own eyes can see and our own minds can conceive. And we all have a crucial role to play. But each time that we try to force our own “right answer” into our experiences, we close ourselves off from that collective energy. It is when we surrender and compassionately acknowledge that we don’t have the answer, that we open ourselves up to our highest good and greatest work.
So the next time you feel anxious, irritated, time-pressured, pause. Become aware of how you are approaching the situation in front of you: are you forcing your own agenda, your own ‘right answer’ onto the experience? Just notice, then disconnect; take a breath; take a walk; clear the energy. Finally, open yourself up to the idea that the answer might lie outside of your current perception; be present and allow guidance to come without intentionally seeking it.
Peace, patience, and surrender.