Back to Blog
Have you ever had ‘one of those days’? One where you wake up and things just start to fall apart? The day has literally just started and you already feel like you are running behind; your anxious, irritable; nothing feels right; and you either want to lash out at everyone you see, or curl up in a ball and cry? What’s really happening there?
I’ll tell you what- fear is happening. Your ego is having a fear fit (or at least that’s what my experience has been). My most recent fear fit was the result of reaching a point in my life where I could no longer hide behind the comfort of being a student- I couldn’t keep my knowledge safely tucked inside a book, a class, an assignment. I could no longer rely on continual external validation of my strengths, skills, intelligence, and what I saw as my value. Talk about a perfectionist’s nightmare!
Now the truth is, that fear has had a good long run in my life: from degree to advanced degree to certification; and for awhile, I could admirably hide behind the painful, the exhausting, but the safe and ego-enhancing guise of ‘academic’. And honestly, I could’ve continued down this path; there is no shortage of degrees, licenses, certifications out there- in my field (Health and Wellness) alone! And our egos would LOVE that, to keep a stronghold on our world perspective, so that we only see what we have to lose and where we might not be enough. So when we begin to step into our light and unleash our power, they throw fear fits as an attempt to keep us scared so we play it safe and stay small.
But guess what happens then? You never get to share your one-of-a-kind magic with the world, and the world is a bit dimmer as a result. A total lose-lose! So what are we to do in those times when fear makes us feel like the world is crumbling around us?
We can remember all that we are, we can realize we are not our fear-thoughts, and we can step into the fear, face it head on, and see what’s really there. Usually it’s no more than a big scary shadow that our ego has projected over the situation. Still, it feels terrifying. So as you begin to fight back against your fear fits, remember these three keys:
1. It’s a practice. You may not get through it on the first try, and that’s OK! Each time you look your fear in the face, you grow a little stronger, a bit more confident, and your light shines more brightly as a result.
2. You are more than any one thing you DO. Period. Sometimes stepping into our light will result in slips, stumbles, and flat out rejection, and that’s ok, too, as long as we remember that our worth is not dependent on what we do or have, as our fear-hungry ego is eager to have us believe.
3. Forgive yourself, please. Our minds can be the meanest people we know, if we let them. But in each situation, we have the opportunity to choose love, to forgive ourselves for our mistakes, and to decide that things were meant to shake out this way so that we could become more whole. (I can’t wait for you to experience how much space you open up for compassion to flood your life with this one!)
When you begin to open up to this perspective, things shift. You realize that the pain of staying where you are is worse than the pain of facing your fears so that you can grow into who you are meant to be. You breathe a little fuller, you stand a little taller, and your mind becomes clearer. You create more space. You and I need that, and the world needs that from us as well! So where are fear monsters hiding out in your life? What are they keeping you from doing or becoming? And what do you need so that you can shine a light on them and illuminate your best self on the other side?
Sending clarity and courage,